Friday, March 11, 2011

coming home


Last weekend I spent a much needed couple of days back home in Bristol. Getting to indulge in the sort of creature comforts I don't have at University (double bed, a deep bath, a clean kitchen) is one of my favourite parts of returning home as well as having a catch up with my parents. It's a funny stage to be at now that I've left home and I'm doing my own thing. When you move away your relationship with your parents changes but in quite a nice way. As I get older I realise that there isn't really an 'okay, I'm an adult now' moment. I'm 20 this year and I'm learning that I don't think people ever feel properly grown up. I'm still waiting to wake up one morning Big style and realise it's happened. But moving away sortof initiates a change in relations with the parents in that you start to interact with them as a fellow 'adult'. I remember my Mum saying that one of the saddest things about her Dad dying when she was 23 was that she felt she was only just starting to get to know him as a fellow adult and that the new stage in their standing as Father and Daughter felt really special because she wasn't just 'his child' any more, she was an adult in her own right and this added new dimensions to the way in which they interacted.
 
It's odd not automatically knowing the details of my Parents lives and having to ask questions like 'how's work?' when before I would know from the conversations over the table at dinnertime but I think we're all enjoying the new benefits (my Mum and Stepdad seem to be able to afford weekend breaks in Berlin and all kinds of treats now that my laptop charger isn't sucking costly electricity bills from the sockets and I'm no longer around to empty the fridge) and it makes going home to visit extra special. 

As usual a large stack of mail was waiting for me, this time with a big parcel containing these workwear boots I'd ordered from eBay a couple of months ago. They're a perfect replacement for the pair that fell apart when I was traveling America and had to guiltily leave in Brooklyn. Getting to look through the shell of your wardrobe is also a novelty as you can remind yourself of the garments you'd forgotten about. I found this old Clinique lippie in 'Just Raisin' hanging out with the dusty tumbleweeds on my desk, which along with the boots I've been wearing lots this week. I was sent off at the end of the weekend with a quarter loaf of bread from our local bakery all tightly wrapped in foil and various jams to add to my store cupboard here and though I was sort of sad to leave, there was something bizarrely homely about returning to Manchester, towering stacks of dirty crockery and all.

10 comments:

Olivia Isabella. said...

I really enjoyed this post! Looking forward to Uni (still a few years off, haha) but didn't really think about how my relationship with my parents would change...
LOVE your new boots!

Olivia x
unionolivia.blogspot.com

Vicky said...

Those boots are perfect x

Caitlin said...

this is lovely. reminds of how much i would miss my mum in 1st year, and how much i love a clean kitchen x

Phoebe said...

Those boots are amazing, why am I so terrible with ebay.

Kate said...

I love those boots!
& totally get what you mean about growing up! I don't feel like an adult at all, but feel like i've matured & changed but in a good way...ha my poor attempt at putting things into words 8)
x

Ally said...

Yep I can relate to everything here, it really is lovely when you leave home and start to relate to your parents in an entirely different way (and realise how much they did for you!). I couldn't wait to move out, but now that I live on the other side of the world to my parents I realise just how much they have supported me and helped make me who I am. And yep I often think I should feel/act more like an adult now (especially now that I am no longer a student) but it is true there is no 'moment'.

On another note, those boots are fantastic!

A. said...

i swear i have that same top. hope you're well lovely! mail me sometime, x

lovelydisco said...

I went back to college after weekend trips at home laden down with homemade bread, sausages and ham. Always. Now my mom sends me care packages of tights, umbrellas and Irish magazines. She's insane.

lafashionelle said...

love those boots of yours!

Bird On A Wire said...

YIKES! Can't believe you are only 20 years old! I'm just getting to grips with turning 28 this year and YES you are definitely right, you just don't get used to getting older... i don't mean this to sound at all pataronising but once you get past 24...the years just disappear!! Its a little scary. But I have to say WELL DONE YOU for producing such and eloquently elegant blog, truely a joy to follow and read, an inspiration indeed. x
http://thoughtsandthingsfromthebirdonawire.blogspot.com/